It means she feels proud for what you've done or achieved. Maybe instead of telling me hes proud of me, like its such a surprise, maybe he should have just offered to do the dishes. Especially when your best friend is saying You make me proud, they arent just complimenting you. Gun owners are more likely than non-gun owners to know someone who has been shot (51% vs. 40% of non-owners). Since first publishing this piece, I've spent many years thinking about, and discussing, why children might like to hear their parents say "I'm proud of you". Ben Casnocha It is a darn good thing that you wrote your opinion; that I found it tonight, and that comments continue to be accepted. 9 Focus on Them When Praising Them PeopleImages / Getty Images I'm so proud of your painting!" Mull over various relaxing options, like meeting up for coffee or tea, and then send along one concrete plan, Manly says. You are asked at the cocktail party what you do. It can be difficult to respond to Im proud of you if youre struggling with self-doubt. Towards Net Zero. I really dont see that she had a direct influence in what I chose to do. Let me tell you why. Even if it's true, he says, "I don't want to think that I was walking around for a long time looking like hell.". Thank you so much for this great compliment. And why should I stop using this phrase? I believe you. Let them know that you are grateful for their support and that you appreciate their words. I am still so mad, but I havent said anything about it. the person who says that is actually talking about themselves, not about me, and by saying that is drawing the recognition away from me towards themselves. 5. Because of this, it might feel awkward to say "I'm proud of you" to a friend or colleague, even if you mean it. Best of BBC Future. To try to sum this up, I mrried and ended up in a small, isolated village filled with people who either did not graduate high school or barely achieved that level of schooling. Its a way of saying I see the hard work youve put in and I appreciate it. 2. It is an accomplishment that makes good memories in life. I also have to let go of holding it against him, because I presume it was a well-meaning gaffeinstead of saying how happy he is for me, as hes never been belittling before. I believe many people do not understand and appreciate the expression Im proud FOR you. But worse, my friend thanked them. posted by aimedwander at 4:27 PM on May 17, 2015 . Someone has just gone out of their way to say something nice to you. Here are seven possible ways to interpret his compliment. But I believe that spouses say it, and siblings. Try these new and funny excuses to ask for money from your parents or your family. http://pbskids.org/rogers/songLyricsImProudOfYou.html. My friends tell me that rather often so like once every month or so, which I think is a lot, if you say it more often you'll take it for granted for sure. Here are some tips on how to respond to Im proud of you: Following these tips will help to ensure that you are responding to Im proud of you in a meaningful way. 2. I was irritated by that remark. Future Planet. Is it OK to respond to "I am proud of you" with "Me to", "So do I", and "I am too", and "I am proud of you too"? I use the other terms like Im so happy for you. 16. What, do you really? From what I read, she falls into the category of know them well but I wonder if its not something a bit out of place. I am so lucky to have you in my life and your . Of course, the child may feel really pleased to hear this positive evaluation of their efforts. 2. I can make it possible only because you give me hope. You must log in or register to reply here. I was very annoyed with her (mainly due to her attitude) and balled her out at the til. The phrase that has always hit me hardest, however, has been "I'm proud of you." Someone saying that they're proud of you implies that, not only are they impressed by what you do and who you are, they also want others to know it. That proud phrase didnt bother me at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder, what does she mean when she says shes proud of me? Probably no big deal but would be interested in input from others especially other females. Isnt she elevating herself above me to oversea my behaviors to make sure I was a good little girl? I know that it is in the nature of the internet that you can confirm, and get consensus about most any belief you have, but, if that is what has happened here, Im OK with it. February 18, 2023 There are people who interpret life as if it were all about a fight of egos. God being what He is, at once moral and all-powerful, the immoral life is doomed to overthrow, whether the immorality consist in grasping rapacity, proud self-aggrandizement, cruel exaction, exulting triumph or senseless idolatry. 13. I think that the phrase really bothers me, because its like saying, Wow, I didnt think you were good enough to ever achieve -insert whatever here.- My fiance said it to me last night while I was doing the dishes. But to be proud of them? They have everything to do with your strength, and what you've endured. Its 10 years later, and I hope that, by now, you have told your children, if you mean it, that you are proud of them. 1. Although its worth taking a mental note of that in case a pattern does develop. I thought to myself, who is she to be proud of me? . It got me thinking, "How many people could send me that sort of email?" The Proud Boys . JavaScript is disabled. When someone says Im proud of you, they are expressing their admiration and respect for you and that can be a powerful thing. Overall, seeing your parents, family and loved ones are proud of you, is a great compliment. It's a pretty good deal. Try The Behaviour Window. You are happy they are an ambassador for you. You look so much better!". When somebody says that you are wrong: "You are entitled to your incorrect opinion." To each his own. Because we ran into a bunch of other classmates that were also there, we didnt spend time exclusively with each other but we did sit together at the game. You're not necessarily the expert. One of the most common phrases they use to express their feelings is Im proud of you. said Christopher Robin. Narcissism can be a personality trait and a mental health disorder, and someone can have narcissistic tendencies without being labeled a "narcissist." When you live with narcissistic. First, there's physical attraction. Anyone could tell how proud he is to be with you by the giant grin that's plastered on his face when you two are together. The next morning, I woke up to an email in my inbox that was one line: "I'm really proud of you." Then there's emotional attraction. My former partner just recently told me that he was proud of me after major accomplishment. Thank you for starting this. When someone insults you, the first thing you want to do is take a pause and a deep breath. Second, he must know you well. Sajeev Rajan So we arranged to have her drive to the hotel where I was staying and we drove there together. But only emotionally intelligent people understand why. Connect, Converse and Communicate Better. Think of things people have often praised. We can all have slightly different interpretations of words which if not careful can start a war! You would have to know the whole story. 12. Image used under license from Shutterstock, Larissa Dann. Rather than the child feeling respected for their efforts, they may feel patronised, put-down. 16. I have never said to my children, I am proud of you. My reason is that thry are responsile for their successes and I shoudnt take any credit for it. Im happy that youre with me in good and bad times. He may not have expected you to be qualified for the job. Imagine this: Four-year-old John shows his Mum a painting he's just done. They are much more aware and can see through false motivation easily. Use thirty phrases to say "I'm proud of you" to make the special person feel good and empowered. Larissa Dann, a veteran trainer of Parent Effectiveness Training in Australia, suggests that we stop saying "I am proud of you," and start saying, "I am proud for you." 1 It is a subtle shift from the accomplishment being about the parent to the accomplishment being about the child. In fact, whenever I hear this phrase from a colleague, I immediately understand that this person in reality is envious of my achievements and the phrase Im really happy for you in fact means Im very unhappy that its not my achievement, that you and not me is getting the praise/ promotion/ degree/ lottery win, I hate you for that and I wish I was in your place right now. A parent might say this to a child, perhaps. Thank you all, too. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. (Of course, there are always people who try to suck up to youbut hopefully you can see through it!) Thanks, buddy! In this research, children of parents who never said "I'm proud of you" were significantly more likely to contemplate, plan or attempt suicide. 4 . SFD a bit late in the day to be commenting but I think your assessment of the phrase is spot on. It can be something big or something small it doesnt matter, because the phrase is used to show their appreciation for your efforts and accomplishments. I again said. It makes a difference I think. My native language is not English, but I have fallen into the unfortunate (for somethings) of social netwoks, like facebook. I, too, rightly believe that I had little to do with my offspring making his way in life in a manner that is worthy, but as parent, conveying I am proud of you, has distinctive and important meaning. If this is the case, then of whom is the parent really proud? "Always work hard, be honest, and be proud of who you are.". Oh.. very good. July 7, 2020 April 21, 2018 How many people in your life can say, "I'm proud of you," and you take it fully and without any sort of resentment or dismissal? Let them know you think it's great they're considering quitting and that you're ready to help. A special note on research suggesting that parents saying "I'm proud of you" prevents future mental illness and suicidal ideation in their children. Yes, I'm sure you've come across "me too" in such situations, but it's very often ambiguous, or sounds arrogant. If a homeless guy on the street (lower status) or Bill Gates (don't know him personally) tell me they're proud of me it won't have a huge positive effect. Hosted by Pressable. But what exactly does this phrase mean and how should you respond to it? I have deep concerns if children crave to hear "I'm proud of you" because they want to know that their parents approve of them - of their behaviour, of their decisions in life.