Have you heard about this person’s loss? Or email them a shared folder with photos of their loved one in subject line. It expresses regret and tells him that you're thinking of him. These simple phrases below will help you bridge that gap between feeling awkward and offering genuine words of sympathy to someone you may not know very well.

It's a game changer--get it free for a limited time! After I lost Kyle, my best friend told me that every time I saw a butterfly, I would hear Kyle say, “Love you momma,” and dragonflies, he would say, “Hey, hey momma!” because Kyle was such a cut up. But perhaps your comfort can be helpful in other ways, like picking up mail or dealing with logistics. A text message is generally appropriate while avoiding the use of emojis. When a close friend has a death in the family, it's sometimes difficult to approach him with the right words. Yes, your words matter, so please choose them wisely. ", "I'm running errands, can I pick anything up for you? Don’t you love it when we have memories that make us feel great? Many friends, myself included, have seen loved ones and colleagues who have struggled with COVID-19.

Another idea for “intentional mode” is to make a playlist for someone who is grieving, even if you don’t know their favorite comforting songs. But don't worry!

Ever feel like you just can't keep up? If you're assertive, let the person grieving know that you are going to be taking care of things for them. Distance is physical. She was a wonderful woman. You may offer to pick up the slack at work, help them deliver a project, or fill in for them at work. “I’m sorry for your loss. There will be time, later on, to catch up. And there are a number of ways to express your condolences without saying something less than heartfelt. They are better off. Please let me know how I can help you during this difficult time.”, 3. In 2013, I was in the grandstands cheering on Amby Burfoot, my cousin, as he ran the 45th anniversary of winning the Boston Marathon, only to see the first bomb explode directly across the street.

2020 Bustle Digital Group. With a little thought, you can find comforting phrases that express exactly what you want to say to comfort a grieving friend or family member. “Asking how people are doing and sharing stories,” she said, adding that the sense of isolation we are experiencing magnifies grief for people. Honor a loved one even if you can't be there with a virtual funeral... Or this comment I heard at a friend’s son’s funeral: Well, he was just a “druggy” anyway, so no big loss. I am Susan B. Mead, an author, speaker, chaplain and mom. Your email address will not be published. Please help us improve. Please do not be tempted to define their grief with your words. The jump drive allowed me get to it when I was able versus losing the most important gift a friend could give me – memories of my loved one. Let your friend know that they matter…to you. I imagine but I don’t know, for I am well aware that no one could trully understand how you feel when confronted to the loss of someone you hold so dear. Forget the clichés or any packaged sayings; it's important to be genuine. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you to keep on living as if nothing had changed, when you are going through such an ordeal. Twitter.

Follow that nudge! It’s important not to make this about you, so carefully consider the length of your message and words you choose. I'm here. I'm going to check in with you. If you're going to pick up groceries for yourself, text your friend. If the pictures are digital, put the photos on a jump drive and mail to them. Reminding the person who has lost a loved one that you still hold them in your thoughts and prayers may be one of the most supportive gestures you can make. Should you find pictures later as you go through photographs, SEND them then! You can count on my presence and comfort. "If I could comfort you with words, I hope I text all the right letters." You may want to consider some significant dates, such as: 1st anniversary of their loss – send a card, a photo, a video, or something that honors their loss. Can I share that this was the best delivery I received, as I was not stocked for masses of caring visitors? May you find comfort and peace during this difficult time. Hug them. “Please accept my heartfelt condolences to you and your family on your uncle's death.